But this is the final straw. I am beyond frustrated with my Internet connection. It has been two weeks. Two weeks of really unimaginably slow Internet that I wish I could kick and punch. Two weeks of suppressed frustration.

Wanna know how bad it is? As I’m typing this, this page is still being loaded. A 4-minute Youtube video has been loading for the past 10 minutes, and it’s not even halfway through. It took me 5 minutes to download a 26 kB file. KB. Kilobytes, not mega, not giga. My Internet is so slow that it can’t even complete a speed test. 

And I am done with not ranting because I am so close to kicking and screaming at mid-air. The tangibility of Internet does not concern me, I just want to hurt it; if my Internet was a person, I would kick the shit out of it, and after I’d stab it, then kick it again. 

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, INTERNET. Let me just put my argument across.

1. We pay for a 50Mbps Internet
2. We have no bandwidth limit
3. This happens even if I am sitting beside the modem
4. This happens only to things I own. e.g. My laptop and my phone
5. THIS ONLY HAPPENS TO ME - there are 4 other people living in this household with access to the Internet, but it only doesn’t work for me.

So maybe I’m jumping to conclusions here, but I think my Internet has a personal vendetta against me. It knows I’m using it, and it stops working. Oh, that video I was talking about earlier on, it still hasn’t loaded completely, but it did just cross its halfway mark. Did I mention I love my Internet? I love it so much. 

In case you didn’t know, I happen to be a very very patient person.